


What if I cared of you?

by Zeruby



Series: Hank's Daily writing challenge 2019 [5]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Depressed Hank Anderson, Deviant Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Hank Anderson Deserves Happiness, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-16 05:23:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18684991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zeruby/pseuds/Zeruby
Summary: Day 2: After the so-called war between deviants and humans had ended, and Connor had taken his own life, Hank finds himself missing the android. Weeks later Hank is left alone with his dark thought and "what if's".





	What if I cared of you?

**Author's Note:**

> This oneshot is for my writing challenge in Tumblr.

Hank sits alone over his desk at work and scans over the folds of the deviants. His heart aches, his mind is elsewhere - if not working at all. Hank can't collect his thoughts or think clearly. Days go by in haze and suddenly almost three weeks has gone by the war between deviants and humans.

_And Connor was suppose to lead the androids they had freed. To give them free'er and safer future._

Hank glances the empty desk next to him, almost expecting to see Connor sitting there and smiling to Hank, trying to talk to him.

_But he had killed himself, shot himself. If only Hank had not given the gun to him._

Hank closes his eyes, pressing his nose between his eyes with his index finger and thumb. If only he had not given the gun to Connor, the bloody android wouldn't have shot himself. But had Hank not given the gun to him so that Connor would be safe?

_And Connor would probably found a way to kill himself even without the gun._

 

Hank sighs, and leans to the back of the chair, keeping his eyes still close. Of course Connor would have found a way, Hank reminds himself, the bloody android was smart. He had has reason to do it, and nobody seemed to know why - expect for the quess that Connor too might have been an deviant and for a duty or some shit like that he killed himself. Connor had been deviant, Hank new it, but hadn't revealed it to anyone even to this day.

_What if Connor hadn't been an deviant, would things have gone differently?_

Hank doesen't know, and isn't even sure if he want's to know. Connor showed emotions while being deviant and Hank actually liked it that way, Connor showing emotios. He had saved Hak's life more tha once over doing his duty. Hank opens his eyes and feels his heart clenching in his chest. God damnit it hurt. He looks at his desk, not really seeing it.

_What if he had gone with him? Would Connor still be alive?_

Hank takes a deep, shaky breath and leand his elbows to the table, crossing his hands and leaning his head to his hands. He felst so bad, hurt and sad. So much. So much that he almsot graved the numbess that alcohol brought to him. Few mere months ago Hank had hated androids. Then CuberLife had send an android to help them, _help him_ , with the deviants. And now when Connor was gone, Hank found out that he disliked them less. And how he truly missed Connor, while he had before tried to push him away.

_How many time had he almost shot that stupid android? How many times had he insulted him, hit him, hit him...?_

Too many to count. Only if Hank would have apologied from him when he had the chance. But it was too late now, Connor was dead and not coming back. He wasn't coming back and Hank missed him. A lump rised in his throat and tears threatened to rise in his eyes. Hank clasps his hands tighter and tries to focus on breathing. He _would not_ cry at work. He would not _cry_ at _work_. He would... not... cry...

"Hey, lietnaunt Anderson. We got you a new android as a partner" officer Potter says from behind Hank, who opens his eyes. He has to blink few times before the tears go away. A new android as a partner? But he didn't want a new android as partner.

"Oh really? Well I don't want it" Hank says. I _want Connor._  

"Well that is too bad, lietnaunt" all too familiar voice calls behind him. Hank's heart seems to stop. He has to stare at his hands few second in pure shock, before he can even think. Then, when he recoveres a little from it, he straightens his back and turns to see officer Potter with a small smirk on his lips and Connor next to him. But was it really _the_ Connor, or the fucking inposter?

"And here I thought you'd want your parter back" Potter says and his smirk only waidens when he sees Hank's shocked face.

"But... How... Is that even the Connor I like, or just a-look-a-like?" Hank doesen't know what to ask, or what he want's to know, or does he want to know anything. Beer. That's all he wants. And Connor, real Connor, not this fake one.

"I am the real Conor, lietnaunt. We saw last time in quite bad situation. And I..." Connor stops, lowering his eyes to floor. The little sirckle on his temple flickers and his face shows small amount of sadness. Hank stares at him, as does Potter. "I am sorry for what I did. Officer Potter told me you have been quite gloomy since" Connor lifts his eyes back to Hank and the android's face is indeed sad. Hank doesen't know what to say, so he turns to Potter.

"Elijah Kamski fixed him, brought back the Connor you fancy. He had found Connor to be rather... interesting when you visited him. It took some time from him, few tries... But here he is, Connor who feels" Potter says. Hank opens his mouth, but couldn't pronounce any words. Then he turned to Connor, who had his neutral face back on. So this little shit was indeed his Connor? And that bloody Kamski fixed him? 

"So you'll work with me? How long?" Hank asks. Connor's eyes seem to lit up, if that was even possible.

"Until you retire" Connor answers with a smile. Hank nods, actually happy to hear this. Connor was back.

_But what if something happens, and Connor does it again? Or what if someone else kills him?_

"Alright" Hank says as his heart cleches again. "But with one condition. You wil never, and I mean _never_ , pull that kind trick again. You understand me?" Corner of Connor's lip turned up and he nodded, while officer Potter had to keep himself from snickering. 

"Connor is added to CyberLife's new police android program. If there will be some problems with him, the geeks from there will ckeck on him" Potter says, then he nods and turns away, leaving Connor and Hank alone. Hank sighs and before he can think of it any further, he stands and with few steps is in front of him. Connor looks surprised, even more so when Hank's arms go round him and Connor finds himself hugging Hank.

 _"If only I would have told you sooner to be careful and come back to me"_ Hank whispers.


End file.
